I Say, If It Doesn't Work for You, Don't Agonize Over it

I have a friend who is a professional speaker, like me. He was very successful in another business, retired and now has a terrific message that he can deliver in a very entertaining way. That sounds like a "can't miss" formula for success, right? You would think.

He started his speaking business in 1998 but he has barely gotten out of the starting blocks. His speaking earnings are way lower then they should be. Why? It's taken a few years for us to figure this out. (You are going to think, "Geeeeez you two are slow!" Especially when you see that the answer is so obvious. But look at the bigger picture -- aren't there times when it takes years for ourselves to see what is plainly obvious to others?)

It boils down to this. In the back of his mind he sees marketing as imposing himself on people. And his fear of rejection is so strong that he agonizes about cold calling on people who hire speakers. (I'll admit, I hate it, too. Cold calling can mess with your ego.)

His logical mind knows better. So my friend has worked for years at overcoming his "defect" in character. He's read books, attended seminars, and worked with a marketing consultant. He has written cold calling scripts and practiced on me. He's got great looking marketing materials that are well worded. But still, the idea of actually making cold calls makes him want to throw up. Many mornings he has sat at his desk determined to make calls. But after the first one or two he is easily distracted by trivial things like filing.

There is an old American saying, "Anybody can do anything if they put their mind to it." I no longer believe that's a true statement.

I still believe we have to push our limits to discover what we are capable of. But I also believe that if something doesn't work for him, me or you, the smartest thing is to stop agonizing and move onto something else.

In my friend's case, the last time we had coffee I gave him permission to never make cold calls again. Instead, I recommended he market himself by donating free speeches to civic clubs, join networking groups, and do an intense post card mailing campaign to a list of decision makers at 200 companies that should hire him. I also recommended he give away DVDs of his speech to people who hire speakers. He agreed that all of those things could work for him. But still he wants to overcome this cold calling thing.

Is there any advice you want to pass along to him? Let me know by posting here. Or shoot me an email at Doug@DougSmart.com.